We brought a bench from Miami that has a broken strap. Rather than throw it out, I placed it near the door of Chuck’s shed and now I use it almost every day! When I am changing my shoes from walking shoes to working shoes or when I’m taking off the dirty working shoes, I sit on that bench and look out down the canal towards the East. For some reason the breeze always seems to be in my face on that bench. I look at our trees and at the water always moving by. I feel the breeze and look up at the sky. It is a place where I am alone. The bench is hidden by the shed door. It’s not a pretty place near the open shed! but it’s in a quiet place. I receive an email from a religious group with saint of the day and other messages. Today there is a picture of a woman sitting on the floor at the foot of her bed. The room is dark. She weeps. The article suggests we go ahead and cry and weep, and then, the article suggests praying the Psalm De profundis: " Out of the depths I cry to you, O God." We are in difficult times. Covid is real and it is killing people. The election is over, but we are still fighting about it. Well, I’m trying not to fight…. Go ahead and recognize the ordeal! Lift your head and Plan to live through the day, looking around until you can see the light. I think the hardest thing is to get up from the floor and move toward the door that leads outside. At my age, it’s hard to get up off the floor. I look really awkward in my "get off the floor process", moving from my sprawling position in the yard pulling weeds to standing up… My old body is cranky. My hamstrings are tight!!! It’s not an option to sit in the dirt out in the weeds, but it is an option to sit on the floor at the foot of my bed. I groan. Finally I’m up and I move! When people offer help, I say "No, I have to get myself up in case I’m ever alone." … It’s a struggle. It’s hard! But, get up! Take a few steps towards the window…. Look out. This morning dawned cloudy and misty. "OH! No!!!!!" I said, "I can’t walk in misty rain"…. But get out!!!! It will clear. Of course, I live in Florida, the place of sunshine. Sometimes it doesn’t clear up in the north does it? So make a sunny place inside. Paint it light blue, light yellow!!! Put bright lights there and candles! Go to that bright place every day. Make your own light if you only have darkness. It’s time for me to go out walking and then…. to sit on my bench in the quiet of my yard. Look out and look up. God bless you. Angels with you.
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