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Susie's musings

The mantle of the Blessed Mother

My dear friends and family. I am so blessed to have been able to learn about the comfort faith in our Creator God brings.  I am sitting right now with Aunt Trudy. Holding her hand and comforting her as she is very sick in the hospital. She had pneumonia and lost the ability to walk and now she is very frightened and anxious. We are preparing to take her home to Big Pine Key with Hospice and a full time caregiver. She never wanted to go to the hospital and definitely not to a nursing home and we are respecting that wish and treating her with respect. She might recover at home, and if not then what a most beautiful setting to spend one’s last days as looking out over Bogie channel where we often see porpoises.  What I learned, and what I tell Chuck that I did with him when he couldn’t sleep and he was so anxious in the hospital, was that I put my hand on his chest and I called upon the Blessed Mother to wrap him up just like she does with the baby Jesus in so many statues and pictures we see. Any of us can ask for the Blessed Mother to help us… Just cover us and hold us. Try it with a small restless child. Try it with an anxious old folk….  I am relieving Thelma for the day. I left her at home on Big Pine Key to do her taxes. I wanted to visit Trudy for a while. When I got to the hospital at noon Trudy was crying and twisting and the nurses said she has been like that all morning saying, “I can’t do this..” “Well yeah, who can do this?  Hospitals are awful places especially when you can’t walk or think straight.” So I asked for a relaxant and indeed Atavan is prescribed so we got fixed up with a little relaxer and then the techs did some hygienic things with Trudy and now I am just holding her hand and when she gets agitated, I put my hand on her chest and tell her… “It’s alright, sleep, sleep…” While I was doing that a nurse came in and asked if she could pray… sure. So she called on Jesus and she prayed for Trudy and Trudy moved her lips as if she were praying too. I told Thelma Ann (Chuck’s sister) that their mother couldn’t talk and was so confused, but she could say the Our Father when I asked her if she wanted to pray.  My dears. If you are not a person of faith, please know first that you are not alone. I would say more, but that is enough for now.

Yesterday Chuck was so “on.” We couldn’t understand why Trudy had lost so much ground going from talking and knowing people to confused, agitated, screaming, crying and not knowing Thelma or Chuck. Meanwhile, Thelma could not get the nurses to give her a doctor’s phone number… “What happened?” is a normal question when anyone goes downhill so quickly….  I used to bother the nurses minutely when Chuck had bad things going on and the doctors had to speak to me, but these doctors are too busy and they sneak in and out of the hospital in the dark of the night…. So, everyone got marching orders.  Thelma went to the billing office to be sure they had all the proper information on Trudy’s supplemental insurance. (It is absolutely necessary for us to purchase a policy to cover “the 20% medicare won’t cover”. And we sent Chuck to get medical records with his power of attorney for Trudy. (It is absolutely necessary for us to have power of attorney for each other.) Well… he made a stop at the Risk Manager’s office and talked lawyers and names she knew. Just chatting like Chuck can do… When he came back we began to get nurses coming in and but we did not get to see the doctor… he had “emergencies.” This same thing happened to me with Chuck and it was infuriating. We finally left the hospital as Chuck needed to get out of there. He’s still recovering and he still needs rest. On the drive home from Key West to Big Pine, the doctor called and spoke to Thelma, Karen Skipp called to advise us, and Chuck called Hospice of the Florida Keys. Before we got to the Fish shop where we purchased stone crabs, we had things worked out for Trudy to transfer her to Hospice at home (probably this coming Wednesday). Thelma is really being a trooper as the full time family on site. We need a few days to get a hospital bed and arrange for care. I feel very strongly and feel very proud that “Chuck is back!”   I meanwhile have two books to read. One for my St. Augustine’s book club by Tuesday night (about 20 pages to go), and one called Jesus of Nazareth From the Entry into Jerusalem to the Resurrection (volume 2 by Pope Benedict – he is an excellent writer) that the sisters at Paulinas book store have asked me to read and give a book talk on April 9.  I will alert you as to the exact date and time so maybe some of my family and friends can attend, cheer, and buy my book too. (I’ll even sign it!) God bless you my dear friends and family. Keep praying for us as we’re going through a lot here, but we are not alone.