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Susie's musings

Slipping; Big time!

I spoke last evening with a friend from Miami who can’t come visit as she has a full time job and is trying both to protect us and to protect herself. Isn’t that awful? We used to sip wine and laugh …. We used to have great meals in lovely Coral Gables restaurants and walk long distances together. Now we are separated and only have the phone or text. She said she feels anxious and unsettled. This calls for sliding closer on the sofa and drinking champagne as we share our feelings, but again, miles and Covid separate us. I told her there is no good result in feeling anxious, unsettled, angry, frightened… now (especially now), or any time. We both know "God is in charge", but even I, who know so well that God is in charge, I slip; big time.

Take today…. I walked without my normal friends today so i prayed the Rosary. I use my fingers, I say all the prayers, I try to get the mysteries of the day in order. I usually end up and realize I forgot the Baptism of Jesus… Same today! I prayed. I looked up at the beautiful sky. I thanked God for the gorgeous breeze and the lake view from the park. Then I even sang a few Marian hymns. As soon as I was finished and I turned the corner onto Cumquat I started thinking awful things about our political nemises. Did you ever imagine what you would do to someone including grilling them, calling down wrath, or infecting them? Well if you haven’t, then you are a much better person than I am! "Stop that!" my guardian angel said! I replied! "Yikes! I know! I know. I did all I can. I pray and I voted. That’s it. No bad thoughts. No bad words. "

In the Gospel this morning (Luke 13:10…) Jesus called out to a humped over lady; he laid his hands on her, and he straightened her up. He healed her. The church leaders criticized him for breaking the law. Jesus! They criticized Jesus! Jesus just turned to them from the Cross and asked his Father to forgive them. They are the worst of the worst for not taking care of their people and for criticizing the good man Jesus, and Jesus says not a word but he prays for them. St Paul says in Ephesians 4, "Be kind, forgive, have compassion." Do I believe this? As I walked home today, I asked for forgiveness… It seems I do this every day! "Forgive my sharp tongue and my judgmental imagination!" It’s not for me to judge; it’s for me to pray and vote. Done…. but I look up, and my guardian angel transmits the message, "Keep praying!". Keep admitting we have dirty feet and dirty hands (humility). Admit we can’t act alone (be merciful to me O God). Let God’s heart come in contact with our heart. Open up and show God (He’s seen it all). I have to ask God to get out his special Windex and wash me every time I let my mind go awry and every time my lips speak "not love." God bless us.